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☺•○*iS iT mIcHaEl JaCkSoN???*○•☺ |
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little boy : mommy is god a girl
or a boy?
mummy: why god is both girl and boy
little boy: mommy is god black or white?
mummy:
why god is both black and white
little boy: mommy is god gay or strait?
mummy: why god is both gay and
strait
little boy: mommy is god Michael Jackson?
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○•*○EyElIdS○*•○ |
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Your Momma's so fat, when she blinks, her
eyelids clap!
•♦♠○A husBaNd AnD hIs WiFe○♠♦•
A husband and wife were golfing
when suddenly the woman asked,
"Honey, if I died would you get married again?" The man said,
"No dear." The women said,
"I'm sure you would." So the man
said, "Okay, I would" Then the women asked, "Would you let her
sleep in our bed?" And
the man replied, "Ya, I guess so." Then
the women asked, "Would you let her use my golf clubs?" And the
man replied,
"No, she's left handed."
○*•A dUcK aNd ThE bArTeNdEr•*○
A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender
for some quackers. The bartender explains that the bar doesn't have any quackers.
The next day, the same duck walks
into the bar and asks the bartender for some quackers. The bartender again explains that the bar doesn't serve quackers.
Sure
enough, the very next day, the duck again walks into the bar and asks for some quackers. The bartender screams at the duck,
"If you come in here one more time, I'm going to nail your beak into the wall with a hammer and some nails! "
A few
days pass, and then the duck walks into the bar again.The bartender notices the duck and says, "I'm warning you!"
The duck
replies, "Do you have a hammer?"
The bartender replies, "No!"
The duck asks, "Do you have any nails?"
The bartender
replies, "No!"
The duck grins and asks, "Do you have any quackers?"
•◘○OlD mAn○◘•
A young punk gets on the cross town bus
and sits down in the only vacant seat, directly across from an old man.
The young punk has spiked, multi-colored, green,
purple, and orange hair. His clothing is a tattered mix of leather rags. His legs are bare and he's without shoes. His entire
face and body are riddled with pierced jewelry and his earrings are big, bright red, yellow and green feathers.
The
old man glares at the young punk for him for the next ten miles, as the bus travels across the city.
Finally, the punk
looks across at the old man, and yells, "What are you looking at, old man! Didn't you do anything wild when you were young?"
Without
missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah. Back when I was very young and in the Navy, I got really drunk in Singapore and
had sex with a parrot... I thought you might be my son."
☻○*•DuMb BlOnDeS•*○☻ |
This dumb blonde walks into the hair
solon with head-phones on and asks the stylist for the usual. she made it clear that the stylist was not to take
of the head-phones. while the stylist was cutting the blonde fell asleep. the stylist thought because the blonde was asleep
she wouldn't know if she took off the head-phones, so she took them off. soon after the blonde started turning blue. the stylist
quickly put the head-phones back on and the blonde was fine. the stylist was really confused so she took the head-phones off
and put them on her head. the stylist started cracking up ------ all the other stylists were scared because the blonde was
dying and asked the other stylist what was goin on. the stylist put the head-phone back on the blondes head and told everyone
what the head-phones were playin....."Breathe in breathe out... breathe in breathe out.
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